Reflecting upon who we allow in our lives

Our Moms' were right!  We do become who we hang out with.

Over and over again this truism plays out in life.  From our teenage years, the discussions we had with our parents regarding our friends to our adult lives with expanding networks of people we are introduced to we have to constantly be aware of the people we are spending time with.  

Depending on our experiences as young children we are often imprinted with habits that are positive or negative.  The hangups we have developed from our families circumstances soon become a crossroads as adults.  I believe we all come to a point where the rose coloured glasses come off and we choose to accept responsibility for our lives or put the glasses back on quick and pretend we didn't see a thing. 

I have made both choices at different times and can relate with the Israelites taking 40 years to do an 11 day journey through the wilderness.  Accepting responsibility for our lives, not blaming our parents and choosing to do the hard work of growing our knowledge in the areas of emotional fitness will start to direct our lives on the path fulfillment.

One of the tremendous areas of my journey has been learning to about co-dependency and what that looks like.  I've had to set some serious boundaries with the people I choose to be part of my daily life.  Loving everyone is vital but allowing them time and space in our lives has to be a choice based upon mutual edification.

"Can I help you, without hurting me? Can we share our lives, without me giving up mine? When do you truly need my help? When do I need to let go, and let you and God handle it? Finding the balance between ‘enough’ and ‘too much’ in relationships is a constant challenge and isn’t easy. Especially when your role tends to be, ‘all things, at all times, to all people’, and theirs is, ‘I’m helpless, you owe me, take care of me’; when you have no ‘no’ and they have no ‘yes’. Needing to be needed by needy people who always want someone to take care of them puts the needy person in the driver’s seat"  Today's Word by Bob Gass

We can learn from each person that crosses our path, even if just for a moment if we are aware of the interaction that happens.  Everyone has something to teach.  

"Well-adjusted people find the right balance between protecting their personal space, and allowing others to infiltrate, manipulate and dominate them. They know how to say yes to what’s healthy and no to what’s not." Today's Word by Bob Gass

Who are the 5 people closest to you?  Do they have the fruit on the tree?  Would you like your lives to reflect theirs?  Just a few questions to think about who you are allowing to influence your life.  I'm off to hangout with some great positive leaders....

This is your life...

Have you ever had a 24 hour period of your life that helped you to put things into perspective?

I had a great couple over for dinner on Saturday night and they were telling me about a story about two young men that intersected their lives recently.  Two young men that were choosing to start over in a humble way and take full responsibility for their lives.  We then had a discussion about a home business idea and how its success could impact their lives.

I went to bed with a smile on my face knowing that these two people had found each other and were sharing a journey that was filled with God's purpose.

I am a member of Grace Fellowship - Don Mills and so Sunday I awoke and prepared to hear what God was going to share with this church family.  Our Pastor spoke about how we read and apply the Bible.  What struck me was walking out our belief and being able to ask God about His promises.  I have a huge promise in my heart that I had prayed about that morning. and here was God via Julian saying go ahead and ask, but don't just ask believe My answer and live accordingly.

Next I met with a couple I hadn't seen in over 10 years and they were as gracious and kind as I had remembered.  They extended a warm welcome and said where would you like to go?  They would like to work with me to achieve my goals and dreams.  They reminded me that motivation is comprised of motive to take action.  What is my motive and what do I want to achieve?  Great questions.

I had a hour drive to my next appointment and pondered their questions.  The next couple I met are the wonderful parents of a very close friend that we recently lost to cancer.  We laughed at some of the memories and cried as we shared how much we miss him.  This beautiful couple that are in their senior years spoke of how much they'd like to build relationships with their grandchildren still.

I came home and enjoyed a glorious sunset on my balcony and then spent an hour watching various fireworks going off throughout the city.  All the while pondering how each day God gives us is a reason for celebration, whether it be tears of joy or sadness life is made richer by the people we share the experiences with.

I will continue to invest my life into the people God brings across my path and store my treasures in heaven.