Each new day is a fresh start

Seven days in...the goals are set...life happens...choices are made.  Learning about God's mercies being new each day leads to healthy self-care and a thankful heart.  

"God engineers circumstances to see what we will do. Will we be the children of our Father in heaven, or will we go back again to the meaner, common-sense attitude? Will we stake all and stand true to Him? “Be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life.” The crown of life means I shall see that my Lord has got the victory after all, even in me."  The Highest Good—The Pilgrim’s Song Book, 530 L

Already this week I see progress, surprises and resulting actions.  As each day presents it new set of circumstances it is in the reflection of these choices that the daily plan is written.  So many of the great leaders I've had the privilege of studying have taught me the simple art of reflection.  Taking 10 minutes at the end of the day to assess how my time was spent allows me to journal and track my progress.

Seeing how I plan my priorities and then other people come along with their set of circumstances and affect my plan, if I so choose.  Being flexible is important.  Laser focus is important.  Which is more important?

Being open and available to God interrupting my daily plans has brought incredible Joy as the bottom line is who are we here to serve, ourselves or Jesus?  

"But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.” Joshua 24:15

In the past I've struggled with allowing people to steal my time in an attempt to being open and available.  The balance lies in discerning whether the people and circumstances that are presenting themselves are an opportunity to serve God or to derail our plans.  

Various time management expert use a chart similar to this one to help us understand how to make choices.  We truly cannot manage time but rather it is ourselves we learn to manage.

At the end of the day if we take the time to review where we've spent those precious moments we've been give we will determine which quadrants we allowing our deposits of time to be invested in.  Choosing wisely to take care of important and not urgent items as our primary focus will ensure progress towards our achieving our goals.

God has brought incredible people into my life through business associations, church affiliations, family and the internet.  "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 It has been the most amazing experience to see just how He has orchestrated my particular set of circumstances.  The lessons I've learned and the phenomenal joy I've beheld by allowing Him to intersect my life with different people is more than I can explain.  I will continue to work out my salvation through managing myself, always at the ready to be flexible enough to receive a Godly interruption.

It’s one thing to hear how God works based on somebody else’s experience, it’s another to see it first hand when you’re wondering, ‘What did I do to deserve this?’ or asking, ‘If God’s really there, why am I here?’ Why?

Purpose vs Goals

The goals we set should help us to fulfill our purpose.  However, our goals are for us.  Our purpose is emotional, not logical and is not about us.  It is about others and mankind.  

As I was setting my goals for this year I reread some of my earlier blog posts, specifically where I was at in my thinking at the start of the previous years.  What I found amazing was that when I read My Heroes post, it was when I read about my kids that once again the tears flowed.

I wanted to make a difference so that when I leave this planet my legacy will be visible in the lives of my children and future generations of servant leaders.  My goal was to become the best Mom, wife and business women I could be.  I am a good Mom.  My 22 year marriage failed and I am winning as a business woman.  Throughout the success and failures of my life I have not loss track of my purpose.  I have not always waited for God's timing and instead charged full steam ahead on my own thoughts/plans and this did not bode well. 

Now I am learning to wait on the Lord, his timing is perfect. How do you do that? By valuing God’s will more than my own and trusting in His timing which is revealed through the peace that passes all understanding.  

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;

⁶ 

in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.(Proverbs 3:5)

God's timing involves our character development.  We don't always understand waiting once we have a vision or defined a set of goals but He is more interested in our character development than our comfort.  Therefore, we must seek to be able to live out the character qualities of Christ as described in Scripture: 

 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23)

These principles keep our actions within boundaries; honesty, integrity, the golden rule, helping others. I was put here to lead as many people as possible to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ by using the gifts and talents I've received from God for His glory.

Setting purpose driven goals requires having the end in sight.  What is your purpose?  Do your goals line up with the bigger picture?  Have your developed the principles necessary to achieve your ultimate purpose?  Your purpose is what keeps you alive and the sparkle in your eye.

We will find a vehicle that will be used to accomplish our purpose. The vehicle may be a job, business or cause where you volunteer.  Regardless of your vehicle it will involve people and this is where you make eternal deposits.  Your God given purpose will affect others.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 
(Matthew 6:19-20)

Have you found the vehicle to accomplish your goals?  A purpose gives you meaning and you will get passionate and enthusiastic enough to complete your purpose once you find the vehicle to get there.  Passion is the multiplier of your efforts, if you do not have confidence in your vehicle you will not get passionate about driving it.

As this first week of the new year is underway I pray we are focusing on new goals and character development that lead to the fulfillment of our purpose here on earth.  

Who am I pleasing?

Have you ever struggled with people pleasing?  Do you wonder why you do the things you do when you really want to do make different choices?  Have you felt out of control?

I've learned a lot about codependency and people pleasing over the past few years.  It has been quite the journey to unravel my own motivations, hurts, hangups and habits.  We can see ourselves, especially as Christians as motivated to server others when in fact the core reason we do things for others is for their approval.  

Divorce is one of life's biggest rejections and drove me to my knees in search of 'who am I living for', the love of a man, my children, family, friends, team mates, business leaders, clients or myself.  There is real danger in the swinging the pendulum so far after being rejected, to living for oneself.  My quest has been to learn healthy self care while remaining focused upon fulfilling the purpose for which I was created. 

‘Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God’ (2 Corinthians 3:5 NKJV

Through programs like Celebrate Recovery, Divorce Care and great Bible teaching I have come to the point in my life where I've chosen to sell out to the one and only God that so loved me that he sent his own son into the world so that I may have eternal life.  My faith has been an integral part of my life since the age of 13.  However I can tell you that it has taken my to the age of 50 to completely surrender.  It took the Israelites 40 years to make the 11 day journey out of the wilderness and it took me 37!

I cannot begin to express the freedom that I feel in knowing who I am in Christ.  The joy of the Lord is my strength.  I choose to live each day living out His will for my life, slowly discovering how He speaks and directs my steps.  Spending time in God's word, listening to great messages from Bible teachers and submitting to accountability within the local church and a support team keeps my life moving in the right direction.

To understand the difference between submission and selfishness you must ponder these words: ‘So they come to you as people do, they sit before you as My people, and they hear your words, but they do not do them; for with their mouth they show much love, but their hearts pursue their own gain’ (Ezekiel 33:31 NKJV)

My life's goal is to hear the words "Well done good and faithful servant" which can only happen when I live to please God first and foremost, by the example Jesus set. "and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form, like a dove; and a voice came from heaven, "You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased." Luke 3:22  

I am a grateful follower of Jesus Christ.

Goals, Plans and Peace

It's the new year, the second day, so how about all those plans for a new schedule?  Thankfully, we serve a gracious God that has taught me a lot about mercy.  As I begin moving towards my new goals I realize there has to be flexibility and grace in order to have peace and progress.  I have set my goals and I have written my plan.  Now to execute with peace.

I have three main objectives for this year; to become fit physically, get out of debt and find my ministry work.  The physical part involves eating well and of course finally making exercise part of my daily routine.  It really is simple...all diet plans aside, no miracle cure, no quick fixes as it has taken me a long time to get to my current physical condition.  I understand it will take time to reach my vision of fitness. So eat less and move more is my mantra.

The yoke of debt really is a stronghold that can kill you!  It has been a very long journey to get where I am today financially and I have made some great choices and some very poor choices.  One of the most common mistakes of a single Mom is too want to provide your kids with a lifestyle to which they were accustomed to.  This is nearly impossible after a divorce and my attempt to do so has cost me dearly.  I have also experienced immeasurable providence from God and we have all survived, all the wiser.  Now it is time to have my finances line up with the word of God; "Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law."Romans 13:8.

My third goal is to find my next ministry work. I have had the honour and privilege of serving in several different congregations over the years and volunteered with various organizations. My gifting lies in the areas of hospitality, teaching, and encouragement. With these strengths I've been blessed to help out with church coffee programs, taught three year olds to adults and led numerous Bible studies. As I reflect, three major items come to mind; walking alongside a teenager as he chose to get his life in order (this is a great story that will someday be a movie!), coaching new business owners as the embark on starting their own business, and women's small groups.

My Bible reading for today included a passage from Luke and what struck me with the Christmas Season just ending were the words 'peace among those with whom he is pleased!' that sums up my goals for not only this year but my life!

10And the angel said to them, "Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. 11For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.12And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger." 13And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,

14"Glory to God in the highest,

and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!" Luke 2:10-14

2013...the end of an era and the beginning of the next chapter

This is the year I put into practice all the wonderful knowledge my dear God has bestowed upon me. I've often thought (as Joyce Meyer puts it) that "we are equipped beyond our level of obedience". This has been true in my life.

As I look at the bookshelves full of wonderful materials, the google reader full of subscriptions to great blogs and the volumes of audios CDs I own....the question is does my life reflect these great concepts.  As I've entered a new relationship this past year I've become acutely aware of something my children taught me.  "Not everything is a lesson opportunity Mom" is something I heard them say regularly.

Through the amazing people and programs God has brought into my life I've come to know myself well.  I know the good, the bad and the ugly!  One of my gifts is teaching so each new lesson I learn I want to share with those I love. One of the best revelations for me in 2012 was that I can intercede through prayer for those people instead.  This is a vital part of caring for people.  I believe that when the 'student is ready, the teacher will appear' so rather than always sharing my new insights with people, not knowing if they are ready to hear, I'll equip myself and have the answers ready when they do ask.  Spreading seeds of hope via blogging and social media is a great way to expel these new thoughts as I own them.

I also know who's I am.  I was on a quest in 2012 to understand what a surrendered life looked like.  I found this to be one of the most difficult of all questions to answer.  How do we practically live out our faith in a world that is bent on self actualization?

Woe to those who go to great depths

    to hide their plans from the Lord,

who do their work in darkness and think,

    “Who sees us? Who will know?”

¹⁶ 

You turn things upside down,

    as if the potter were thought to be like the clay!

Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it,

    “You did not make me”?

Can the pot say to the potter,

    “You know nothing”? Isaiah 29:15-16

I have voluntarily put myself back on the Potter's wheel daily last year to try to understand how to incorporate God in every area of my life.  I know the messes I can make when I'm leading and truly want to become all that He intended me to be because His plan is so much better than anything I could come up with!

I started reading My Utmost for His Highest Devotional last year and enjoyed the challenges it presented.  Today's message sums it up best for me:

1. My Utmost for His Highest. “. . . my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed . . . .” We will all feel very much ashamed if we do not yield to Jesus the areas of our lives He has asked us to yield to Him. It’s as if Paul were saying, “My determined purpose is to be my utmost for His highest— my best for His glory.” To reach that level of determination is a matter of the will, not of debate or of reasoning. It is absolute and irrevocable surrender of the will at that point. An undue amount of thought and consideration for ourselves is what keeps us from making that decision, although we cover it up with the pretense that it is others we are considering. When we think seriously about what it will cost others if we obey the call of Jesus, we tell God He doesn’t know what our obedience will mean. Keep to the point— He does know. Shut out every other thought and keep yourself before God in this one thing only— my utmost for His highest. I am determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and Him alone.
2. My Unstoppable Determination for His Holiness. “Whether it means life or death-it makes no difference!” (see Philippians 1:21). Paul was determined that nothing would stop him from doing exactly what God wanted. But before we choose to follow God’s will, a crisis must develop in our lives. This happens because we tend to be unresponsive to God’s gentler nudges. He brings us to the place where He asks us to be our utmost for Him and we begin to debate. He then providentially produces a crisis where we have to decide— for or against. That moment becomes a great crossroads in our lives. If a crisis has come to you on any front, surrender your will to Jesus absolutely and irrevocably.

The crisis is over, a 10 year journey of separation, divorce, going back to work full time from consulting part-time, multiple moves including major scaling down, launching a new business, raising 5 teenagers and encouraging them to pursue God's will for their lives, welcoming three new son-in-laws and a grand baby into the family!  I'm exhausted just writing that list :-)!

Most of all God has been faithfully providing for and guiding me and my family each step of the way.  I am so extremely excited about this new year as I walk out the knowledge God has given me and allow Him to develop the discipline I need to carry my responsibilities to fruition.  Prayerfully, I will intercede for those I love and ask for the wisdom necessary to lead where He places me.

Why God why?

When was the last time you asked God the 'why' question?  Sometimes, when things just don't make sense we find ourselves trying to reason and understand how our particular set of circumstances came to be. We want to DO SOMETHING! We are frustrated with where we are or losing hope to see our dreams come true. I experienced one of those seasons this fall and God's timing was perfect as our Pastor, Julian Freeman was completing a series on Genesis.

His sermon called - The God of Astonishingly Complex Providence addressed this question so succinctly.  As a followup to our weekly services most of our congregation meets in small groups and discusses how the biblical principles taught are being adopted and accepted.  With Julian's permission I am sharing these thought provoking questions with you because I found them so profound. 

1. At the heart of the ‘why’ question there are several presuppositions: (1) that you are able to understand; (2) that it would be better to know; (3) that you deserve to know why; (4) that God needs to explain himself to me; and (5) that if there’s no good explanation, God had better fix it.
• What are the ‘why’ questions you are prone to ask God (in your thoughts)?
• Are you hopeful that you’ll trust God more consistently now (and question him less)? Why/Why not?
• We sometimes fail to see the severity of questioning God. What’s wrong with having a light hearted attitude toward our struggles in this area?
2. Trust in God’s providence gives us contentment with our lot.
• Are you content? If so, how can you attest to God’s grace in your being contentedness. If not, ways have you been struggling with discontentment?
• What are you failing to trust God for? Explain how truth from Genesis 37-39 can help you in your battle for contentment?  
• How would trusting in God’s providence change the way you are deal with your current circumstances (and make you more obedient now)?
3. Trust in God’s providence gives patience for his work in others.
• What is it so hard for you to be patient with (in other people)?
• How would a long-view of God’s providential work in the world help your patience towards these people?

The sermons in this series were for me, timely and exceptionally impactful.  Coming to terms with God's providence, sovereignty, our dreams and ultimately the fact that our lives are a very small part of His story.  I found this series to be freeing, encouraging and inspirational all at the same time.  My journey to coming to complete surrender to God has been a long one....50 years of preparation in fact.  I've chosen the long painful way so very often and yet God has been faithful.  Coming to the conclusion is that He works in mysterious ways, His ways are always better than anything I could come up with.  Ahhh....letting go....and hanging on to His promises.

It is really very simple as the hymn says "Trust and obey, for there’s no other way

To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey"

I am free to choose to serve my God and He doesn't need me, I need Him!  Thank you Julian for putting life here on 'planet hollywood' into the proper perspective.  I am developing patience.  

Reflecting on turning 50!

50! Is it just a number or is it more?  So many people have struggled with turning a certain age. I remember a friend not wanting to celebrate their 40th birthday, it was about their expectation of what life was supposed to look like at 40.  Is that why the milestone birthdays affect people?

Each new year I like to take the time to reflect on the past year and look forward to what lies on the horizon.  As I approach the 50 mile marker I find myself in transition once again.  This journey has definitely not been a dull one.  I chose to follow Christ as a teenager and the older I get the more I realize how much I don't know.

As Joyce Meyer often puts it "I'm not where I want to be but thank God I'm not where I use to be".  I see God's handiwork everywhere in my life.  I have so many reasons to be thankful.  If I never accomplished another thing...with God's help I've raised 5 incredible young adults.  No career could surpass the joy of seeing five lives choosing a faith walk.

I see so many families with young children and can encourage you to stay the course, fight the good fight of teaching a disciplined life to your kids. They do come back and thank you when they become adults!

For all those women that are aspiring to become Proverbs 31 women, I can tell you that the moment your children 'arise and call her blessed' every sleep deprived night, the hundreds of nursemaid moments, the many repeated discussions and countless hours as a taxi driver are all worth it.

One of life's greatest moments recently has been to watch my child become a parent and bond with their baby.  To know that they are capable of loving and leading.

I can look back and remember the people I've loved and lost. Today I look around me and am thankful for the many programs that have inspired me to continue to grow (Coffee Break, Amway, Divorce Care, Celebrate Recovery) and the coaches/counsellors that have given me perspective when I've lost sight of the bigger goals. It is truly the people; family, friends and small groups that help us see who we are and how we can improve.

I've moved 16 times now and I know there will be more to add to that number. From empty nesting to hot flashes....there is always a new season of adjustment.

I look forward and own my choices in work and play. I treasure each new day as a fresh start with God's grace and mercy as ^'I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.' Phil 3:14 

I encourage others to discover their God given gifts and pursue their destiny, knowing that we are not islands and one day we'll account for our time here on earth.

My birthday wish is that you may know the richness of serving others in love and measure success by the number of lives you affect along the way.