2013...the end of an era and the beginning of the next chapter

This is the year I put into practice all the wonderful knowledge my dear God has bestowed upon me. I've often thought (as Joyce Meyer puts it) that "we are equipped beyond our level of obedience". This has been true in my life.

As I look at the bookshelves full of wonderful materials, the google reader full of subscriptions to great blogs and the volumes of audios CDs I own....the question is does my life reflect these great concepts.  As I've entered a new relationship this past year I've become acutely aware of something my children taught me.  "Not everything is a lesson opportunity Mom" is something I heard them say regularly.

Through the amazing people and programs God has brought into my life I've come to know myself well.  I know the good, the bad and the ugly!  One of my gifts is teaching so each new lesson I learn I want to share with those I love. One of the best revelations for me in 2012 was that I can intercede through prayer for those people instead.  This is a vital part of caring for people.  I believe that when the 'student is ready, the teacher will appear' so rather than always sharing my new insights with people, not knowing if they are ready to hear, I'll equip myself and have the answers ready when they do ask.  Spreading seeds of hope via blogging and social media is a great way to expel these new thoughts as I own them.

I also know who's I am.  I was on a quest in 2012 to understand what a surrendered life looked like.  I found this to be one of the most difficult of all questions to answer.  How do we practically live out our faith in a world that is bent on self actualization?

Woe to those who go to great depths

    to hide their plans from the Lord,

who do their work in darkness and think,

    “Who sees us? Who will know?”

¹⁶ 

You turn things upside down,

    as if the potter were thought to be like the clay!

Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it,

    “You did not make me”?

Can the pot say to the potter,

    “You know nothing”? Isaiah 29:15-16

I have voluntarily put myself back on the Potter's wheel daily last year to try to understand how to incorporate God in every area of my life.  I know the messes I can make when I'm leading and truly want to become all that He intended me to be because His plan is so much better than anything I could come up with!

I started reading My Utmost for His Highest Devotional last year and enjoyed the challenges it presented.  Today's message sums it up best for me:

1. My Utmost for His Highest. “. . . my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed . . . .” We will all feel very much ashamed if we do not yield to Jesus the areas of our lives He has asked us to yield to Him. It’s as if Paul were saying, “My determined purpose is to be my utmost for His highest— my best for His glory.” To reach that level of determination is a matter of the will, not of debate or of reasoning. It is absolute and irrevocable surrender of the will at that point. An undue amount of thought and consideration for ourselves is what keeps us from making that decision, although we cover it up with the pretense that it is others we are considering. When we think seriously about what it will cost others if we obey the call of Jesus, we tell God He doesn’t know what our obedience will mean. Keep to the point— He does know. Shut out every other thought and keep yourself before God in this one thing only— my utmost for His highest. I am determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and Him alone.
2. My Unstoppable Determination for His Holiness. “Whether it means life or death-it makes no difference!” (see Philippians 1:21). Paul was determined that nothing would stop him from doing exactly what God wanted. But before we choose to follow God’s will, a crisis must develop in our lives. This happens because we tend to be unresponsive to God’s gentler nudges. He brings us to the place where He asks us to be our utmost for Him and we begin to debate. He then providentially produces a crisis where we have to decide— for or against. That moment becomes a great crossroads in our lives. If a crisis has come to you on any front, surrender your will to Jesus absolutely and irrevocably.

The crisis is over, a 10 year journey of separation, divorce, going back to work full time from consulting part-time, multiple moves including major scaling down, launching a new business, raising 5 teenagers and encouraging them to pursue God's will for their lives, welcoming three new son-in-laws and a grand baby into the family!  I'm exhausted just writing that list :-)!

Most of all God has been faithfully providing for and guiding me and my family each step of the way.  I am so extremely excited about this new year as I walk out the knowledge God has given me and allow Him to develop the discipline I need to carry my responsibilities to fruition.  Prayerfully, I will intercede for those I love and ask for the wisdom necessary to lead where He places me.

Julie/Julia

Funny...how busy life is. I saw this title in my drafts and realize how appropriate that I found this today. I watched this movie with my wonderful daughter on Jan 24, 2010. Need I say more about being too busy!

Busy is not a badge I wear proudly; in fact I'd much rather be fruitful than busy. My amazing daughter (that loves to cook, as I did) has now graduated High School and tomorrow starts off on her new adventure. A new city, a job in a restaurant to investigate further whether cooking or restaurant management will be her career choice.

This plan has been in the works for a while and it hit me like a ton of bricks last weekend. The fact that this era of our lives is over. I've had two other daughter's graduate high school and pursue their choices so why is this so different? This daughter is my baby girl...really is that it?

Her twin brother's are a grade behind....mhmmm I think we are getting closer to the truth. It is amazing how we focus on our futures, our plans, hopes and ambitions and then one day wake up and realize the future is NOW! I've had the philosophy that my privilege as a mother is to raise each unique child towards their strengths. It's been my goal to take them from dependent infants to 18 year old's that know who they are and are ready to stand on their own.

The letting go is just as important as the initial bonding of the child. The knowledge that we've imparted life's important messages and grounded them in faith. Then setting them free to explore, fall down, get back up and begin their own journey.

She's off tomorrow...I'll adjust the groceries, visit her room from time to time and be very thankful for technology and instant communication and pray that as she embarks on writing the next chapter of her life; I'll remain the constant cheerleader!

I'll remember how friendly this daughter was as a little girl. She excelled at swimming! She is poetry in motion in a the water. This beautiful, independent, creative, fun, spontaneous, insightful girl made friends wherever she went. She took over my kitchen almost two years ago and helped this family out with meals and driving. Thanks Baby Doll!

As I write this I'm listening to one of my favourite speakers; aptly Charles Stanley's message this week is called "Holding Too Tightly". Thank you God for the reminder; another one set free with love, prayer and blessing.

New Years.....endings and beginnings

This past Christmas wraps up a whole year of realization! It was last December when I felt that there was no better time to be building my business. I was on a great reward trip with my daughter; while my sister was having Cancer surgery and listening to the biggest leaders in the network marketing industry share their vision.

There are moments that make you stand still and reassess your priorities. After that trip the kids and I went to Thunder Bay to visit my eldest daughter and her husband for Christmas. It was a time to put down the electronics and enjoy my family. Coming out of a difficult season of my life and realizing we had not only survived but grown in many ways. I felt blessed but also a little lost. What was my motivation now....surviving the many changes divorce brought was accomplished.

It's taken a whole year to put my plan into action; removing myself from a full-time job where I really enjoyed the work, the team and the clients to be able to focus on my true passion; Leadership Development. Their is a God given vision inside each of us and I know I'll never be fully content unless I do what I've been called to do. With much anguish I began the journey of letting go of the stability of a regular pay cheque to do what I love the most.

I fear far too many people die with their dreams still inside them. I refuse that path and have chosen the path less traveled. I am thankful that my children not only understand but are encouraging me to pursue my passion; even if it means KD for supper! I am one blessed Mom and business owner that is very excited to be starting 2010 on the right path for me! I wish each of you the courage to become all you are meant to be. Here is a great poem that says it well.

Dies slowly by Pablo Neruda

Dies slowly he who transforms himself in slave of habit,
repeating every day the same itineraries,
who does not change brand,
does not risk to wear a new color and doesn't talk to whom doesn't know.

Dies slowly he who makes of television his guru.
Dies slowly he who avoids a passion,
who prefers black to white
and the dots on the "i" to a whirlpool of emotions,
just those ones that recover the gleam from the eyes,
smiles from the yawns,
hearts from the stumbling and feelings.

Dies slowly he who does not overthrow the table when is unhappy at work,
who does not risk the certain for the uncertain
to go toward that dream that is keeping him awake.
Who does not allow, at least one time in life, to flee from sensate advises.
Dies slowly he who does not travel, does not read,
does not listen to music, who does not find grace in himself.

Dies slowly he who destroys his self love,
who does not accept somebody's help.
Dies slowly he who passes his days complaining of
his bad luck or the incessant rain.
Dies slowly he who abandons a project before starting it,
who does not ask over a subject that does not know
or who does not answer when being asked about something he knows.

Dies slowly he who does not share his emotions, joys and sadness,
who does not trust, who does not even try.
Dies slowly he who does not relive his memories
and continues getting emotional as if living them at that moment.
Dies slowly he who does not intent excelling,
who does not learn from the stones of the road of life,
who does not love and let somebody love.

Let's avoid death in soft quotes,
remembering always that to be alive demands an effort much bigger
that the simple fact of breathing.