Purpose vs Goals

The goals we set should help us to fulfill our purpose.  However, our goals are for us.  Our purpose is emotional, not logical and is not about us.  It is about others and mankind.  

As I was setting my goals for this year I reread some of my earlier blog posts, specifically where I was at in my thinking at the start of the previous years.  What I found amazing was that when I read My Heroes post, it was when I read about my kids that once again the tears flowed.

I wanted to make a difference so that when I leave this planet my legacy will be visible in the lives of my children and future generations of servant leaders.  My goal was to become the best Mom, wife and business women I could be.  I am a good Mom.  My 22 year marriage failed and I am winning as a business woman.  Throughout the success and failures of my life I have not loss track of my purpose.  I have not always waited for God's timing and instead charged full steam ahead on my own thoughts/plans and this did not bode well. 

Now I am learning to wait on the Lord, his timing is perfect. How do you do that? By valuing God’s will more than my own and trusting in His timing which is revealed through the peace that passes all understanding.  

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;

⁶ 

in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.(Proverbs 3:5)

God's timing involves our character development.  We don't always understand waiting once we have a vision or defined a set of goals but He is more interested in our character development than our comfort.  Therefore, we must seek to be able to live out the character qualities of Christ as described in Scripture: 

 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23)

These principles keep our actions within boundaries; honesty, integrity, the golden rule, helping others. I was put here to lead as many people as possible to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ by using the gifts and talents I've received from God for His glory.

Setting purpose driven goals requires having the end in sight.  What is your purpose?  Do your goals line up with the bigger picture?  Have your developed the principles necessary to achieve your ultimate purpose?  Your purpose is what keeps you alive and the sparkle in your eye.

We will find a vehicle that will be used to accomplish our purpose. The vehicle may be a job, business or cause where you volunteer.  Regardless of your vehicle it will involve people and this is where you make eternal deposits.  Your God given purpose will affect others.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 
(Matthew 6:19-20)

Have you found the vehicle to accomplish your goals?  A purpose gives you meaning and you will get passionate and enthusiastic enough to complete your purpose once you find the vehicle to get there.  Passion is the multiplier of your efforts, if you do not have confidence in your vehicle you will not get passionate about driving it.

As this first week of the new year is underway I pray we are focusing on new goals and character development that lead to the fulfillment of our purpose here on earth.  

Who am I pleasing?

Have you ever struggled with people pleasing?  Do you wonder why you do the things you do when you really want to do make different choices?  Have you felt out of control?

I've learned a lot about codependency and people pleasing over the past few years.  It has been quite the journey to unravel my own motivations, hurts, hangups and habits.  We can see ourselves, especially as Christians as motivated to server others when in fact the core reason we do things for others is for their approval.  

Divorce is one of life's biggest rejections and drove me to my knees in search of 'who am I living for', the love of a man, my children, family, friends, team mates, business leaders, clients or myself.  There is real danger in the swinging the pendulum so far after being rejected, to living for oneself.  My quest has been to learn healthy self care while remaining focused upon fulfilling the purpose for which I was created. 

‘Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God’ (2 Corinthians 3:5 NKJV

Through programs like Celebrate Recovery, Divorce Care and great Bible teaching I have come to the point in my life where I've chosen to sell out to the one and only God that so loved me that he sent his own son into the world so that I may have eternal life.  My faith has been an integral part of my life since the age of 13.  However I can tell you that it has taken my to the age of 50 to completely surrender.  It took the Israelites 40 years to make the 11 day journey out of the wilderness and it took me 37!

I cannot begin to express the freedom that I feel in knowing who I am in Christ.  The joy of the Lord is my strength.  I choose to live each day living out His will for my life, slowly discovering how He speaks and directs my steps.  Spending time in God's word, listening to great messages from Bible teachers and submitting to accountability within the local church and a support team keeps my life moving in the right direction.

To understand the difference between submission and selfishness you must ponder these words: ‘So they come to you as people do, they sit before you as My people, and they hear your words, but they do not do them; for with their mouth they show much love, but their hearts pursue their own gain’ (Ezekiel 33:31 NKJV)

My life's goal is to hear the words "Well done good and faithful servant" which can only happen when I live to please God first and foremost, by the example Jesus set. "and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form, like a dove; and a voice came from heaven, "You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased." Luke 3:22  

I am a grateful follower of Jesus Christ.

2013...the end of an era and the beginning of the next chapter

This is the year I put into practice all the wonderful knowledge my dear God has bestowed upon me. I've often thought (as Joyce Meyer puts it) that "we are equipped beyond our level of obedience". This has been true in my life.

As I look at the bookshelves full of wonderful materials, the google reader full of subscriptions to great blogs and the volumes of audios CDs I own....the question is does my life reflect these great concepts.  As I've entered a new relationship this past year I've become acutely aware of something my children taught me.  "Not everything is a lesson opportunity Mom" is something I heard them say regularly.

Through the amazing people and programs God has brought into my life I've come to know myself well.  I know the good, the bad and the ugly!  One of my gifts is teaching so each new lesson I learn I want to share with those I love. One of the best revelations for me in 2012 was that I can intercede through prayer for those people instead.  This is a vital part of caring for people.  I believe that when the 'student is ready, the teacher will appear' so rather than always sharing my new insights with people, not knowing if they are ready to hear, I'll equip myself and have the answers ready when they do ask.  Spreading seeds of hope via blogging and social media is a great way to expel these new thoughts as I own them.

I also know who's I am.  I was on a quest in 2012 to understand what a surrendered life looked like.  I found this to be one of the most difficult of all questions to answer.  How do we practically live out our faith in a world that is bent on self actualization?

Woe to those who go to great depths

    to hide their plans from the Lord,

who do their work in darkness and think,

    “Who sees us? Who will know?”

¹⁶ 

You turn things upside down,

    as if the potter were thought to be like the clay!

Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it,

    “You did not make me”?

Can the pot say to the potter,

    “You know nothing”? Isaiah 29:15-16

I have voluntarily put myself back on the Potter's wheel daily last year to try to understand how to incorporate God in every area of my life.  I know the messes I can make when I'm leading and truly want to become all that He intended me to be because His plan is so much better than anything I could come up with!

I started reading My Utmost for His Highest Devotional last year and enjoyed the challenges it presented.  Today's message sums it up best for me:

1. My Utmost for His Highest. “. . . my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed . . . .” We will all feel very much ashamed if we do not yield to Jesus the areas of our lives He has asked us to yield to Him. It’s as if Paul were saying, “My determined purpose is to be my utmost for His highest— my best for His glory.” To reach that level of determination is a matter of the will, not of debate or of reasoning. It is absolute and irrevocable surrender of the will at that point. An undue amount of thought and consideration for ourselves is what keeps us from making that decision, although we cover it up with the pretense that it is others we are considering. When we think seriously about what it will cost others if we obey the call of Jesus, we tell God He doesn’t know what our obedience will mean. Keep to the point— He does know. Shut out every other thought and keep yourself before God in this one thing only— my utmost for His highest. I am determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and Him alone.
2. My Unstoppable Determination for His Holiness. “Whether it means life or death-it makes no difference!” (see Philippians 1:21). Paul was determined that nothing would stop him from doing exactly what God wanted. But before we choose to follow God’s will, a crisis must develop in our lives. This happens because we tend to be unresponsive to God’s gentler nudges. He brings us to the place where He asks us to be our utmost for Him and we begin to debate. He then providentially produces a crisis where we have to decide— for or against. That moment becomes a great crossroads in our lives. If a crisis has come to you on any front, surrender your will to Jesus absolutely and irrevocably.

The crisis is over, a 10 year journey of separation, divorce, going back to work full time from consulting part-time, multiple moves including major scaling down, launching a new business, raising 5 teenagers and encouraging them to pursue God's will for their lives, welcoming three new son-in-laws and a grand baby into the family!  I'm exhausted just writing that list :-)!

Most of all God has been faithfully providing for and guiding me and my family each step of the way.  I am so extremely excited about this new year as I walk out the knowledge God has given me and allow Him to develop the discipline I need to carry my responsibilities to fruition.  Prayerfully, I will intercede for those I love and ask for the wisdom necessary to lead where He places me.

Why God why?

When was the last time you asked God the 'why' question?  Sometimes, when things just don't make sense we find ourselves trying to reason and understand how our particular set of circumstances came to be. We want to DO SOMETHING! We are frustrated with where we are or losing hope to see our dreams come true. I experienced one of those seasons this fall and God's timing was perfect as our Pastor, Julian Freeman was completing a series on Genesis.

His sermon called - The God of Astonishingly Complex Providence addressed this question so succinctly.  As a followup to our weekly services most of our congregation meets in small groups and discusses how the biblical principles taught are being adopted and accepted.  With Julian's permission I am sharing these thought provoking questions with you because I found them so profound. 

1. At the heart of the ‘why’ question there are several presuppositions: (1) that you are able to understand; (2) that it would be better to know; (3) that you deserve to know why; (4) that God needs to explain himself to me; and (5) that if there’s no good explanation, God had better fix it.
• What are the ‘why’ questions you are prone to ask God (in your thoughts)?
• Are you hopeful that you’ll trust God more consistently now (and question him less)? Why/Why not?
• We sometimes fail to see the severity of questioning God. What’s wrong with having a light hearted attitude toward our struggles in this area?
2. Trust in God’s providence gives us contentment with our lot.
• Are you content? If so, how can you attest to God’s grace in your being contentedness. If not, ways have you been struggling with discontentment?
• What are you failing to trust God for? Explain how truth from Genesis 37-39 can help you in your battle for contentment?  
• How would trusting in God’s providence change the way you are deal with your current circumstances (and make you more obedient now)?
3. Trust in God’s providence gives patience for his work in others.
• What is it so hard for you to be patient with (in other people)?
• How would a long-view of God’s providential work in the world help your patience towards these people?

The sermons in this series were for me, timely and exceptionally impactful.  Coming to terms with God's providence, sovereignty, our dreams and ultimately the fact that our lives are a very small part of His story.  I found this series to be freeing, encouraging and inspirational all at the same time.  My journey to coming to complete surrender to God has been a long one....50 years of preparation in fact.  I've chosen the long painful way so very often and yet God has been faithful.  Coming to the conclusion is that He works in mysterious ways, His ways are always better than anything I could come up with.  Ahhh....letting go....and hanging on to His promises.

It is really very simple as the hymn says "Trust and obey, for there’s no other way

To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey"

I am free to choose to serve my God and He doesn't need me, I need Him!  Thank you Julian for putting life here on 'planet hollywood' into the proper perspective.  I am developing patience.  

Reflecting on turning 50!

50! Is it just a number or is it more?  So many people have struggled with turning a certain age. I remember a friend not wanting to celebrate their 40th birthday, it was about their expectation of what life was supposed to look like at 40.  Is that why the milestone birthdays affect people?

Each new year I like to take the time to reflect on the past year and look forward to what lies on the horizon.  As I approach the 50 mile marker I find myself in transition once again.  This journey has definitely not been a dull one.  I chose to follow Christ as a teenager and the older I get the more I realize how much I don't know.

As Joyce Meyer often puts it "I'm not where I want to be but thank God I'm not where I use to be".  I see God's handiwork everywhere in my life.  I have so many reasons to be thankful.  If I never accomplished another thing...with God's help I've raised 5 incredible young adults.  No career could surpass the joy of seeing five lives choosing a faith walk.

I see so many families with young children and can encourage you to stay the course, fight the good fight of teaching a disciplined life to your kids. They do come back and thank you when they become adults!

For all those women that are aspiring to become Proverbs 31 women, I can tell you that the moment your children 'arise and call her blessed' every sleep deprived night, the hundreds of nursemaid moments, the many repeated discussions and countless hours as a taxi driver are all worth it.

One of life's greatest moments recently has been to watch my child become a parent and bond with their baby.  To know that they are capable of loving and leading.

I can look back and remember the people I've loved and lost. Today I look around me and am thankful for the many programs that have inspired me to continue to grow (Coffee Break, Amway, Divorce Care, Celebrate Recovery) and the coaches/counsellors that have given me perspective when I've lost sight of the bigger goals. It is truly the people; family, friends and small groups that help us see who we are and how we can improve.

I've moved 16 times now and I know there will be more to add to that number. From empty nesting to hot flashes....there is always a new season of adjustment.

I look forward and own my choices in work and play. I treasure each new day as a fresh start with God's grace and mercy as ^'I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.' Phil 3:14 

I encourage others to discover their God given gifts and pursue their destiny, knowing that we are not islands and one day we'll account for our time here on earth.

My birthday wish is that you may know the richness of serving others in love and measure success by the number of lives you affect along the way.

The Bible and why it's the best selling book ever!

Do You Love God's Word?

One of the first books to come off the printing press when it was invented was the Bible. And it’s still the world’s best-selling book. An anonymous author has written: ‘It contains the mind of God, the state of man, the way of salvation, the fate of sinners, and the happiness of believers. It is a light to direct you, food to nourish you, and comfort to cheer you. It is the traveller’s road map, the pilot’s compass, the soldier’s weapon, and the player’s game plan. It’s a mine of incredible wealth, and a river of genuine joy. Its doctrines are holy, its precepts are binding, its histories are true, and its decisions are immutable. Christ is its grand subject, your good its design, and the glory of God its end. Read it to be wise, believe it to be safe, practice it to be spiritually healthy. Read it slowly, frequently and prayerfully. Let it fill your memory, rule your heart, and guide your steps. It is given to you in life, will be opened at the judgment, and be remembered for ever. It involves the highest responsibility, will reward the greatest labour, and judge those who trifle with its sacred contents.’ The Bible is ‘The word of our God which shall stand forever…’ (1Peter 1:25). Most of us respect the Bible; the trouble is we don’t read it daily and put it into practice. After hearing a discussion on various translations of the Bible, one man said: ‘I prefer my mother’s translation, because she translated it into everyday life.’ Are you doing that?

“Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.' Matthew 24:35 NIV

This is my favourite online devotional.  The author is Bob Gass

Living, Loving and Letting go

Walking along side a friend through an illness teaches you much about that person, yourself and everyone affected.  I recently lost one of my best friends.  When he became aware of his brain tumor almost two years ago he took it in stride and remained hopeful to the very end of his life here on earth.  He would say "I have peace either way Kathy, whichever God prefers".  His sense of humour and testimony of faith were beautiful to witness.

During one of my hospital visits Bob asked me to bring in my laptop and let him update his facebook status.  We took a picture and posted it.  He had over 140 responses within 24 hrs.  This man touched lives!  His gift was to serve and he genuinely put others first.

The friends and family I got to meet through this journey just confirmed how humble and loving this man was.   He served so many people in his lifetime that it was an honour to be able to serve him near the end.  His parents are amazing people, no wonder Bob was so thoughtful. 

Each visit I was reminded that it may be my last...is that not how we are supposed to live each day?  Bob blessed me with unconditional love and acceptance, he was my biggest fan.  I think of you often my friend and am living each day to the fullest.

To know that he is now dancing before his Lord and Saviour makes me smile.  His visitation and memorial service were packed with people from every area of his life.  He made a friend wherever he went and if anyone chose not to accept his offer of a relationship it was their loss.

Here is the tribute video his son-in-law and daughter prepared for him:

Until we meet again Bob, thank you from the bottom of my heart for our years as sojourners. 

Waiting on God

A summer without kids at home full time...

It's hard to believe the summer is nearing end. I started with such great plans...as always! I am amazed yet again at how easily it is to become derailed from fulfilling our God given purpose. I was very excited (once I got over the mini-melt down of having no kids at home this summer) at the opportunity to spend some long over due quiet time with my maker. I had two main goals, to organize my home and my businesses. Yes I own more than one business.

I know my strengths and weaknesses and still I fell into the many distractions set for me. What an amazing journey. I set time aside to attend Kingdom Bound 2010 as well as Joyce Meyer's Toronto Conference and went with an open mind searching for some answers. I landed flat on my face the first day of Kingdom Bound (literally...broke a small bone in my nose and hand - but they are healing now). My fall got my attention. At the end of the week of a lot of great worship and messages I came to the realization that it is in the fire that God does the purifying.

Still trying to apply this message I listened to Joyce Meyer's messages all last week and realized how much I'd been beating myself up. Next enter Charles Stanley and his teaching on The Truth that Sets us Free and I was reminded all over again about choices. So I chose to listen to a couple CDs that I had purchased after hearing Sheila Wray Gregoire speak. I went to bed feeling much better after all those messages over a two week period. I realized I was just focusing too much attention on the things of this world which I never desired to succeed at any way. What a relief!

I am very thankful for my local Bible teaching church (Calvary Pentecostal Assembly) and when I attended yesterday's service our youth Pastor Jamie Nelson shared a great message about the sick man by the water and Jesus asking him did he want to get well? Are we living through a position of hurt or hope? What a great question. As I was coming out of the long....very long tyranny of not enough time with God and far too much time with Kathy I realized I wasn't focused on where my hope came from. Getting an eternal perspective changes everything.

My favourite devotional The Vine reminded me yesterday that I had to choose to get serious about following God and today that means I need to play to my strengths. I read three devotional emails a day, The Vine, K-Love's encouragement of the day and 300 Words a day-thanks Chris Brogan. Each of these help me to keep it simple (as long as I choose to read and apply).

Some times it really is as simple as pausing to hear the messages daily and taking it one day at a time! I woke up at 4 am and had to come listen to this video:



I pray that you know where your strength comes from, that you were born for a purpose and that you are able to sort through the many distractions of this life and know that your days have eternal value.

Couldn't say this any better:

Tamara Lowe's AMAZING JESUS RAP



No one but NO ONE was put here to take up space! Make a difference today; reach out and do a random act of kindness and ask yourself how you feel after. It is in serving others that we are fulfilled.

What are we doing with our lives?

Our belief systems are evident in our lifestyles. It has been an incredible week or two of self-discovery and thankfulness. I've heard the saying before concerning our purpose being hidden in what makes us sing and what makes us cry. Our Pastor this morning spoke about naturalism vs Biblical theism and challenged us with our authenticity. It was an incredible service that concluded a week of ups and downs.



This roller coaster of a life we often live is exhausting. I've had to stop on several occasions and get off the roller coaster, step back and look at what was in the valleys and what were the mountain top experiences. I crave stability! I am not guaranteed that; however, I am assured of faithfulness of my God so that I am not alone on this ride.



Unfortunately we seem to learn best in the valleys when we realize we just can't do it all or we are so hurt we can even see straight. It is when I get to the end of myself, flat on my back, looking up that I see once again who is in control. We have been set free to fly solo and yet forget that in order to fly we need the wind; those currents that cause us to build our strength as we counter them to reach our goals. My belief in intelligent design ensures that I understand that I have a role to play.



What am I doing with this life I've been given? What do I think about most; myself or serving others? Ouch!



I've had a person remind me of my shortcomings and while that hurt; it was my choice as to whether or not I chose to be offended. (Thanks Joyce Meyer for your messages this week!) I've had an acquaintance randomly give me money; I graciously received this gift with thankfulness. I've heard of that happening to others and it is quite overwhelming to just accept a free gift that is undeserved. Yet....that is what God has done for me; the free gift of salvation.



I accepted it, I believe it, but do I live it? I think the churches are full of great believers but are we great followers? Do we allow fear or faith to be the basis of our decisions?



It is time we Christians stood up for our beliefs so that others can see that we are channels of love to a hurting world. We are here for a purpose! Our lives need to be reflective of our choice to live for God. This life is a gift and what we do with it is our gift back to our creator!

Preparing to Pursue The Dream again....

As I prepare to go back to self-employment, I am thankful, excited and want to give God all the praise. So much happens in the course of a week in my life that I am always amazed at the dates on the calendar.

My sons turned 16 last month - yes I am blessed with twin boys after having three daughters. They really are double the joy. Watching how they interact brings a smile to my face most days. They have never known a life without a playmate. As one walks into the room and says "Ping Pong" the other jumps up and off they go.

For each of my children I've attempted to do something extra special for their 16th birthday as it seems like a real transition time in their lives. I had been thinking about these two turning 16 all year and last spring decided that I'd like to get them tickets to see their favorite hockey teams play against each other. For one, they've never been to see a professional hockey game (I know, how does that happen in Canada?). Secondly, I found out that Calgary and Toronto play against each other once a year in each city.

Therefore, I decided last spring already that this was to be their gift. I shared this goal with several people including the guys from work. In August a co-worker (thanks Rob-true Leafs fan!) let me know the schedule was coming out that day. I came home from work, checked and lo and behold as my finger travelled down the computer screen looking for the match up....Calgary came to Toronto on their 16th birthday! Yes God is that Great - on their actual birthday.

How would I ever contain myself. I did a little dance and shout in my kitchen and sent my son-in-law a text - I knew he'd celebrate with me; being a hockey fan himself. I had to find tickets and keep it a secret until the big day! With the help of my daughters we pulled it off....except my business conference was the same weekend.

I don't miss those conferences as they have been life lines for me. So much more than a business conference. I am blessed with a team of people to lead and take that responsibililty very serious. My children understand that and we celebrate birthday's when it is convenient for all of us. My daughter (and her boyfriend) to the rescue. They would do the driving.

As I sat at my conference I was reminded of how dreams do come true and was thinking about the boys preparing for their game. I was reflecting on that as Wes Beavis came on stage, or should I say jumped on a table and began signing "Celebration". I've never seen a speaker with an entrance like his. He shared a great message about overcoming adversity and fear to becoming all we are meant to be. My kind of message....with the exception that as he was ending his talk he began singing "Cat's in the Cradle".

That song was a favourite of a couple important men in my life and as I listened I wept. It was 10 years ago I began this business and about the same time on a Saturday afternoon at my first business conference I became overwhelmed with the fact that I was born for this arena. This year, as I had already planned my transition strategy from work, and was preparing to pursue my dream of becoming a business leader; God placed this incredibly talented speaker in front of me.

I was thinking that this song was so out of place in this arena of hope because it is so cyclical and its time to break cycles that aren't productive. As Wes finished the song he said it was time we re-wrote that last verse and I cheered to hear his rendition of the last verse: Family Time. I was reminded of why I choose to build this amazing business opportunity. I am committed to the process; Dream, Struggle, Victory!

Now as I prepare for the next adventure of my life; I am reflecting on how awesome it is to feel like I am in the palm of God's hand. I am basking in His attention to details and thanking Him for the faith of my children as together we take this leap.

As you prepare for this Christmas season I hope you pause long enough to be reminded of who you are and how integral your life is to the bigger purposes here on earth! My gift to you "He that lives in hope danceth without music." by George Herbert.

Believe God for Great Things

With God all things are possible by The Vine.

Matthew 19:26 NIV
The poet wrote, "Beware of those who stand aloof, and greet each venture with reproof. The world would stop if things were run, by those who say, 'It can't be done.'" Refuse to let the word 'impossible' stop you. Jesus said, "With God all things are possible." If those who've changed the world had left every 'impossible' task undone, we'd still be living in the Dark Ages. Here are four examples:

1) German experts predicted that trains travelling at 25 mph would cause severe nose bleeds and the passengers would suffocate going through tunnels. American experts added that we'd need more mental institutions because people would go mad when they saw the first trains.

2) When the YWCA first announced typing classes for women, there was a furious backlash on the grounds that the 'female constitution would deteriorate under such strain.'

3) Experts insisted that iron ships would never float, that the iron would wreak havoc with the compass readings.

4) In 1797, New Jersey farmers denounced the first cast-iron plough, insisting it would poison the land and stimulate weeds. So much for 'experts!'

More of us are persuaded into believing for too little than believing for too much. Vision is essential for survival. And a God-given vision is conceived by faith, sustained by prayer and fuelled by God's Word. It's not about what you can do, but what God can do with your life when it's fully surrendered to Him. It encompasses things outside the realm of the predictable, the safe, and the expected. "Where there is no vision, the people perish" (Proverbs 29:18 AMP). If God has given you a vision; pursue it, and believe Him for great things!

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